This has typically been my experience. If I ask for a raise, my employer does not have the resources, their hands are tied, there’s absolutely nothing they can do.

Then when I find another job, suddenly they find money, can match any offer, and will do whatever it takes to keep me.

I used to take the raise, but not anymore. The employer has already lost trust by lying outright in its initial negotiation. They’ve made me jump through the hoops of a programmer interview process, and wasted my time, their time, and another company’s time, all on a gamble that I can’t or won’t get an attractive offer elsewhere. No thanks, I’ll take my chances elsewhere.