Honestly it sounds like the team is treating you like a "second-class citizen." It seems 100% unreasonable for you to have to attend 3:30am meetings ever let alone twice a month. You need to be able to have a somewhat normal sleep-schedule in order to maintain a healthy lifestyle and to continue to be a productive member of the team and of society. Personally I think you need to re-set some expectations - you're just as much a part of the team as everyone else. Sure you may need to work 1-3 hours outside of "9-5" time to meet in the middle, but so do they. (Unless of course you really like the swing-shift, in which case you need make those hours very consistent and very public.)
My team had 2 remote people who were treated like that for a few months, but they quickly realized it wasn't fair or sustainable and pushed back. So our team-wide meetings got bumped to 9am, and we got good at making decisions that they cared about while they were online. Or we queued up things for them to respond to the following day. It's not as easy as being able to tap someone on the shoulder, but nothing is right now with everyone WFH. Everybody needs to grow up and treat each other with a bit more respect. (/rant but not really)
My team had 2 remote people who were treated like that for a few months, but they quickly realized it wasn't fair or sustainable and pushed back. So our team-wide meetings got bumped to 9am, and we got good at making decisions that they cared about while they were online. Or we queued up things for them to respond to the following day. It's not as easy as being able to tap someone on the shoulder, but nothing is right now with everyone WFH. Everybody needs to grow up and treat each other with a bit more respect. (/rant but not really)