I can relate to some of the grief that people have with mothers that didn't fit the stereotype. I'm one of them: I know mom loves me (or at least I'd like to tell myself that) but she's been abusive to me and my siblings in ways that few can imagine. We've tried our best with interventions, but nothing really helps.
Here's how it's different for me: I'm a practising Muslim and there's strong exhortation in the religion to be kind and respectful to your parents, no matter how they are (e.g. "and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word.") Note it doesn't say you have to love them, because you can't really control that. My learned experience (I'm 41 now) has shown me that on the whole, this approach and advice has been immensely helpful. I feel that despite the worse that's been dished out to me and my siblings, by controlling how I choose to react is very empowering. Plus it sets up a good example to our kids (my mom lives with us since my dad passed a few years back) on how to deal with difficult people.
I find most mothers(yes, I am generalizing) manipulative and toxic. I think going through the traumatic process of biological procreation does something to their psyche and damages them forever. Like PTSD. And they don’t get help. They get Mothers Day cards and flowers instead.
Different women deal with it differently. The glorification of motherhood and the enormous pressure on ‘being a good mom’ and creating gods from mere mortals is only making things worse.
Women would benefit enormously physically and mentally and spiritually if..as a society..we stop gaslighting half the human species into believing that what women have to go through physically is ‘normal’ and glorious because honestly that’s the only way they’d continue to keep getting pregnant and having more babies. Of course, physically, hormones also conspire against them creating an addiction with happy chemicals and endorphins and oxytocin and dopamine etc. But that’s nature. But nature doesn’t have Hallmark moments. It’s evolution.
I am not a feminist in the traditional sense. I dont think women are ‘equal’ to men due to evolution. Our collective biological evolution has made the female of our species superior due to their higher ability to perpetuate humanity as a species, but it has also made one gender biologically weak and vulnerable. Fix that. A true feminist would want to fix that and hack biology and evolution so we are truly equal. Everything else is fluff.
Having said all that..it is always a good thing to respect and love your elders and parents. After all, they are you and you are them. If you are your DNA, an unbroken chain of code...your source code must be treasured and thanked. It’s not going to be perfect but it’s key to understanding yourself and especially when you want to replicate that code.
But it doesn’t have to a mass ‘celebration’ of one day in a year that has become a caricature of sorts rather than anything meaningful.
No. That’s not what I meant. I said that a true feminist would want to fix the biological inequalities and not social inequalities. Hence feminism ..as we know it..is mostly fluff.
Having said that, I am in favour of genetically engineering the human species. If we are to be a space faring species, we will most certainly have to genetically alter the genome.
I don’t know if we can erase sexes. However, there will be a greater degree of feminization. The default gender is female. Y is a ..how you say..I want to call it a mutation.
Patriarchy..as the feminists call it..is just the mutation gone rogue.
Here's how it's different for me: I'm a practising Muslim and there's strong exhortation in the religion to be kind and respectful to your parents, no matter how they are (e.g. "and to parents, good treatment. Whether one or both of them reach old age [while] with you, say not to them [so much as], "uff," and do not repel them but speak to them a noble word.") Note it doesn't say you have to love them, because you can't really control that. My learned experience (I'm 41 now) has shown me that on the whole, this approach and advice has been immensely helpful. I feel that despite the worse that's been dished out to me and my siblings, by controlling how I choose to react is very empowering. Plus it sets up a good example to our kids (my mom lives with us since my dad passed a few years back) on how to deal with difficult people.