I've learned that I prefer mini-metro areas with population on the order of 250k people... you get most of the upsides of a city without many of the downsides, while also retaining advantages of smaller areas like more green spaces and lower cost of living.
Yup, that's the sweet spot. Richmond VA is a great example of such a mid sized city - housing is affordable, traffic is manageable, and it's big enough to have things to do and find like-minded hobbyists.
DC is it for me. I don't want to own a car or drive, I want to ride a bike or take the train everywhere I go, and DC has the infrastructure to support that lifestyle.
The downside of Richmond is that you get to add an extra ~2 hours to most trips to the west coast. Either by the need to change planes in ATL/CLT/ORD/etc, or by having to drive to DCA/IAD to take a direct flight.
RIC is getting more direct flights as volume picks up. Breeze flies to SFO direct, but its not super regular and apparently they cancel them last minute (yikes!).