YouTube is an interesting one. Like the Internet itself, there is some really great stuff, but letting them roam is a recipe for disaster. YouTube Kids has gotten better over the years but nothing's perfect. On one hand, I didn't want to block YT completely but I also wanted to be able to approve anything they watch. So, I did what any other programmer dad would do in this situation and built what I wanted.

They now have a permission layer on top of Safari (as an extension that cannot be disabled when coupled with Safari's content moderation setting). I set Safari to only allow YouTube and any channel they try and view that I have not approved will require them to send a permission request to my phone. That "permission request" is a button + them coming to me with "Hey Dad, I sent you a request". It's worked quite well in our home and has opened a nice dialog about what they are trying to watch and why. I made it public if any other parents are interested -- https://www.sunscreenapp.com/

I think the fact many of you have deeply thought about the topic is amazing, but what I wonder is if you, by restricting devices so heavily (and it's seemingly only about tables and smartphones), also take away any chance at kids getting proficient with computers?

Like, you know, the knowledge people here have: How computers work, hardware, programming.

Maybe it's just not mentioned here, but I see a lot about avoiding social media - which is fine, I get it - and not a lot about teaching kids how technology works.

When I was a kid, I sat at a computer (with my dad) with 3 and the internet starting at 5 or 6.

That said, the internet was very different in the 2000s. It lead to the current hobbies I have and I'm so happy I've had that chance. I, for example, experimented with my own phpMyBB forums at 14 because forums where cool back then.

I've seen reports of more and more younger people having no idea what a file system even is because they have never seen one before because they mainly grow up on tablets, and now they seem to have less of a chance to learn about tech at all because they've barely seen any tech - except smart devices - until they're teenagers.

Which, again, I understand completely. There are dangers online nowadays and I'd want to protect my kids, as well, but while reading all your posts, I felt a bit sad because it also felt like it may take something away, too.

Not an easy problem to solve. How does the crowd here see this?

I think it depends which social media, and this needs to be audited. I was using forums/IRC from about 14(and these are pre-cursors to social media) and there was benefit to being able to discuss things that you might not have been able to IRL.

I think the issues come with image based social media where it's not about exchanging ideas/talking about things but with "living your best life" and curating your public image.

> predators use online spaces to find and groom children. > each your kids to never ever take an inappropriate photo of their bodies.

I think in this day and age it's essential to teach kids how to stay safe online (once they reach an age where the internet is an appropriate place to be). I see people talk all the time about the internet being a dangerous place and it needs to be restricted but not as much about how to manage this.

i remember many discussions about meeting someone form the internet and how to do it safely. i.e. Get a verification photo with today's date, meet in a high-traffic public space, tell a friend (or your parents) where you are going and who you expect to be meeting, ask for a check in at a specific time etc.

I see the benefits of this in theory but in practice I worry that it will just cause more IRL bullying and isolation.

And even then, being excluded from having normal access to a phone still isolates them from "normal" people. Everyone pulls out their phone and all the phoneless person can do is either sit there in jealous silence like a loser or try to get everyone to stop playing on their phones when they're around them (also like a loser).

Overall not an ideal situation.

I have to disagree. There was plenty of bullying and isolation for kids before social media, before the Internet and, I'm sure, even before the printing press.

Kids can be very cruel to each other. This is (mostly) due to an understanding of the world that only includes a limited understanding of cause and effect.

That's not new, nor is it particularly profound. And it has nothing to do with computers or "social media."

Bullying has and will always happen but the form it takes has changed significantly.