I expect that my spouse of many years still compares me with other people. Humans are social creatures and are frequently comparing ourselves and our families to others. While too much can certainly be a recipe for unhappiness, I think that’s one of the primary ways that we learn and grow.
A spreadsheet may feel very shallow and icky, but we also are not privy to the girlfriend’s thoughts and motives in this story. It could just be a tool to help her process her feelings. We don’t know how much weight she assigns to a 2 in Wit. And most relationships start off as “temporary” status.
My spouse has kept a journal off and on over the years. While it may be a shock initially to read something unflattering about myself in there, it also wouldn’t be a deal breaker for me. And not that far removed from a spreadsheet in my opinion.
The things written and said in private are often more real than how that person acts to your face. If I found the same things, it'd call the entire relationship into question.
Maybe you're okay being led on or talked about but that's not universal. Plenty of human behavior is destructive, our social behavior is no exception.
A spreadsheet may feel very shallow and icky, but we also are not privy to the girlfriend’s thoughts and motives in this story. It could just be a tool to help her process her feelings. We don’t know how much weight she assigns to a 2 in Wit. And most relationships start off as “temporary” status.
My spouse has kept a journal off and on over the years. While it may be a shock initially to read something unflattering about myself in there, it also wouldn’t be a deal breaker for me. And not that far removed from a spreadsheet in my opinion.